Christmas Spirit
Usually I just hate christmas. Yesterday - things took a bit of a downturn. Most other years I've been able to brush off the sense of irritation I feel when ever anyone mentions how much their looking forward to putting up their deckies or writing out their cards. I make some grumpy comment and its over with. This year my tollerance of yuletide related joy has plunged new depths. I'm quite worried that I'm in danger of at best really upsetting my work colleagues and at worst become the subject of a disciplinary action in the grounds of religious discrimination. The thing that really gets me is the gooey longing look they have when they say how much they love christmas - revealing a deep seated sense of comfort and belonging to the festival.

Am I just jealous? Is it just big sour grapes that the whole country seems to be celebrating something I either feel excluded from or betraying of my culture and beliefs by joining in. No one would mind if I took the latter position - in fact they would love it - if I joined in like everyone else and wasn't such a killjoy. I can do it where alcohol is concerned. In these cases it has the same significance as football and birthdays. There are other bits I like too. Holidays from work, food, TV, pressies, seeing rellies and friends. I just can't bear that anyone would think that I am doing this because it is christmas.

I discussed it with a colleague today. She suggested that I "get over myself". She may be right - but if I did that I'd have to stop spoiling it for everyone else just when they're enjoying themselves.

Where's the christmas spirit in that?